10 Life Lessons I Learned from Oprah

I adore Oprah.

I always knew she is an incredible person, but I didn’t know a lot about her until a few months ago.

In October, I published my first book, which includes a section with learnings from inspiring people.

And when I brainstormed about powerful women I wanted to include, I knew Oprah was a must-have.

So I did a little research about her.

I wanted to know more about her life and what lessons she has to teach.

And I am so glad I did.

This woman has so much to say.

While millions of people know “The Oprah Winfrey Show”, hardly anyone knows what a hard time she had during her childhood and youth.

Oprah is known as the first African-American woman to build a billion-dollar fortune and is often described as the most influential woman in the world.

During the past months, I’ve read her book “What I know for sure”, and watched many of her interviews and videos.

I’ve compiled tons of lessons, but I decided to only focus on the lessons from her book in this article.

Here’s what I learned from Oprah:

 

“When you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.”

How often do you choose to sit instead of dancing it out?

My personal answer would be too often.

Most of us know Oprah for her tremendous successes, yet, the truth is she faced more struggles than most other people

For example, she was a rape victim at a very young age.

Yet, she managed to get over everything and dance it out.

“What I know for sure is that every day brings a chance for you to draw in a breath, kick off your shoes, and step out and dance — to live free of regret and filled with as much joy, fun, and laughter as you can stand.”

I know that life is not always fun and glory.

Most of my writing, teaching, and videos are about a healthy, strong mindset, and I often receive responses from people who are trying to “take me back to the ground” by telling me that life is not always as easy as I pretend it to be.

Well, guess what: I know that life is not always fun.

However, I believe that in most situations, it’s up to us to make the best out of it.

As Oprah says:

“You can either waltz boldly onto the stage of life and live the way you know your spirit is nudging you to, or you can sit quietly by the wall, receding into the shadows of fear and self-doubt.”

“You can choose your state at any moment.”

Most of our unhappiness evolves because we are not living in the present moment.

We are either holding on to something that happened in the past, or we are overthinking the future. These are actually the only situations problems occur.

If we, however, manage to be fully present at any moment, we wouldn’t experience much anxiety.

By being present and embracing the current moment, you let go of the past as well as the future and start appreciating what you have right now.

“You have the choice this very moment — the only moment you have for certain. I hope you aren’t so wrapped up in nonessential stuff that you forget to really enjoy yourself — because this moment is about to be over.”

“Take your pleasures seriously.”

Oprah is undoubtedly working incredibly hard.

No one can build such an empire from scratch without putting in an incredible amount of work.

However, in her recent videos, interviews, and talks, she shares how important quality time and self-care are to her.

Even though she always worked hard, she learned how to take care of herself and her pleasures early on.

“Work hard and play well.”

This lesson truly resonates with me. I love working hard and working much, but I never miss out on enjoying my pleasures and having a great time.

I believe the hard work is worth nothing if we don’t reap the rewards and enjoy ourselves regularly, in the best case, daily.

Here’s what pleasure depends on, according to Oprah:

“Your base level of pleasure is determined by how you view your whole life.”

Sometimes, we make life harder than it actually is.

Too often, we could simply let things go instead of worrying and getting crazy about nonsense.

“Life is full of delightful treasures if we take a moment to appreciate them.”

“If this were the last day of your life, would you spend it the way you’re spending today?”

Oprah surely isn’t the only or the first person asking this question, but this doesn’t affect its power.

If nothing would matter tomorrow, how would you spend today?

For me, this question leads to goosebumps.

If I knew I was living my very last day, I’d spend time with my loved ones.

I’d cuddle lots, tell them how much I love them, apologize for my mistakes, and enjoy every second.

Appreciating our loves ones sounds obvious, but unfortunately, it isn’t.

Too often, we get so stressed out about our every day lives that we forget being kind to each other.

“Who could I have become if I had finally done the things I always wanted to do?”

Well, this one is at least as powerful as the last one.

I personally know exactly what kind of person I want to be.

I often reflect on my very best version, and I am quite aware of all the qualities I want my future version to have. This helps me to align my daily actions in order to come closer to this ideal future version step by step.

Admittedly, creating a clear vision of my future self was one of the best decisions of my life so far. I always postponed self-reflection exercises as I was afraid of facing inconvenient truths, yet, at the end of 2019, I took many days and faced reality.

I ended up getting clear on my biggest mistakes, but I also created a stunning vision of my future, which is empowering me every day.

“Better food is the foundation for a better life.”

Well, this is not your typical personal development lesson, yet, it’s at least as necessary. Even more, I’d say.

Oprah is not particularly known for her body’s shape. She’s fit, but she’s not Jennifer Lopez — you get the point.

However, she often emphasizes the importance of high-quality food and healthy nutrition.

In my career as a coach and trainer in personal development, I usually experience the following two types of people:

• There’s a bunch of people who are into personal growth, achieving big goals, and building meaningful careers who don’t dedicate much time to their health. They are ambitious in terms of career and personal growth, but they don’t invest much energy in their health. Or they even harm their bodies excessively by smoking or drinking.
• On the other side, there’s a big group of people who are at least as much into their personal development and their careers, but who also take well care of their bodies and their health. Those are often interested in topics like biohacking and high-performance. They have healthy bodies and a strong mind as they develop significant discipline through specific activities like taking cold showers or even ice-bathing.

I would consider myself as a mixture of both. I hit the gym at least three times per week and eat a vegan diet most of the time, I try to avoid certain groceries like sodas or highly processed food, but I indeed enjoy my fries or a big piece of chocolate cake from time to time.

“Whenever I’m faced with a difficult decision, I ask myself: What would I do if I weren’t afraid of making a mistake, feeling rejected, looking foolish, or being alone? I know for sure that when you remove the fear, the answer you’ve been searching for comes into focus.”

I honestly believe there’s not much to add to this beautiful lesson.

Next time you face a difficult decision, make sure to ask yourself Oprah’s question and see how life suddenly becomes more relaxed.

“I’ve found that the best thing to do is ask myself a simple question: What is this here to teach me?”

I know, it’s hard to see the bright side when facing a difficult situation and going through rough times. Yet, there’s always something we can learn, even on the toughest days.

The fact is that you can’t avoid difficult times anyway. They will come. We all face ups and downs regularly. It’s just life. These ups and downs are what make our lives exciting and worth living.

We can’t avoid difficult times, but we can indeed use them wisely by learning, evolving, practicing reflection, and becoming an even stronger person through the tough times.

“Who you’re meant to be evolves from where you are right now. So learning to appreciate your lessons, mistakes, and setbacks as stepping-stones to the future is a clear sign you’re moving in the right direction.”

“What happens when you work hard at something unfulfilling? It drains your spirit. It robs you of your life force. You end up depleted, depressed, and angry.”

This is so powerful.

How many people do you know who are full of joy and passion looking forward to each Monday morning of their lives?

In my case, the answer is too little.

I know many hard-working people, but they work without purpose.

The result is always the same: lots of stress, the same amount of money and too little leisure time.

Too often, we are afraid to go our own way and end up doing what we think we should be doing.

Letting go of these limiting beliefs and spending your life doing things that lift you up, that light up your soul, and give you energy is the smartest and most important decision you can ever make.

“I’ve learned that the more stressful and chaotic things are on the outside, the calmer you need to get on the inside.”

The power and positive impacts of mindful practices like journaling, yoga, or meditation are inevitable.

And still, many people refuse to make time for these practices daily. Oprah experienced the power of a calm mind early on and always prioritized a happy inner state, no matter how busy she was.

In an interview, she explained how she always makes time for silence during her mornings. Sometimes it’s just ten seconds, and some other times it’s an hour.

The length of your mindfulness practice is secondary. What matters is that you respect your own peace so much you prioritize it over anything else, even if it’s for ten seconds.